Still want him in your pack? (_alicesprings) wrote in qaf_challenges,
Still want him in your pack?


Title: The Dreamer
Written By: orlith
Timeline: between S1 and S2
Rating: R
What if: Brian had dreams after Justin’s bashing?
Author's Notes: A really special thanks to my beta, Xie, for her support and commitment to this fic. It’s a hundred times better than it would have been without her.

The Dreamer

Impossible colors surrounded the two men as they swayed together.

“Brian, did you put something in my drink? I can’t possibly see all these colors and be sober.”

Brian gave Justin a look of shock. “I would never put something in your drink.”

Justin made a snort that sounded suspiciously like “bullshit.”

“You little twat!”

“Fuck you, asshole.”

“No, that’s not the way it works. You’re supposed to get fucked, not me. As a matter of fact ...”

Brian put his arms on Justin’s shoulders and tried to turn him around.


“I never lie, it’s bad karma. Not that I give a shit about karma, mind you.” Brian began to nibble on Justin’s neck.

“Brian, that’s not an answer.”

“Sure it is.”

“Keep this up, and you’ll never get my pants off.”

“You’re definitely a twat.” Brian gently took Justin’s earlobe between his teeth and after some very gentle bites that made Justin whimper, said, “I didn’t put anything in your drink. I gave a tab of E to Daphne and she put it in your drink.”

“She fucking did what?” Brian’s tongue and teeth on Justin’s earlobe made Justin moan involuntarily.

Brian worked his tongue and teeth down Justin’s neck to his chest, where he gently went from nibbling on Justin’s ear to biting on Justin’s nipples. Brian grinned as Justin began to moan much louder.

A gasp of excitement exploded from him as Brian started nibbling on Justin’s cock through his jeans. The colors around them seemed to change rhythm and hue.

“Brian! Look at those colors.”

“Maybe later.”

“They’re beautiful.”

“Just keep moaning.”

“I can’t believe you came to the prom.”

Brian looked up and screamed, “Justin!”

A large crack reverberated throughout the air, as the colors exploded around them before turning into blackness.


Jennifer brushed aside the wisps of sweat-stained blond hair that had escaped from underneath the bandages on Justin’s forehead, and kissed him gently on the cheek.

“Sweet dreams, Justin.”

She sat in the torture device that the hospital called a chair, and closed her eyes. After what seemed like two seconds, she leaped out of her chair when Justin started moaning and thrashing.

“Justin, can you hear me?”

“Myam! Myam!”

Myam? “It’s mom, Justin. I’m here.”

Justin’s eyes opened, and his entire body tensed. Jennifer climbed into the bed next to him and held him close. After a minute, his body relaxed and he started sobbing. Blood seeped from underneath the bandages at the back of his head.

The nurse came in, and frowned when she saw the blood. She left and came back a few minutes later. Jennifer left the room while the nurse changed his bandage and gave him a sedative. She leaned against the wall and closed her eyes.

"He'll sleep for a while now. You should go home and get some rest." The nurse had her hand on Jennifer's shoulder.

Jennifer nodded, and thought a change of clothes and coffee that didn't taste like battery acid might do her some good.

Justin watched as Brian lit a cigarette and put his jeans on. The moonlight from the window framed Brian’s head in a coronet of light.

“Where are you going?”

“Where do you think I’m going?”

“To fuck some trick in the backroom at Babylon?”

“Oh! I hadn’t thought about that.”

“What were you thinking about?”

“Getting a blowjob in the backroom at Babylon. I hadn’t thought about the fucking part. I really should consider the big picture.”

“The big picture, huh? I’ve never heard you call it that before.”

“I really have to find a better word for you than twat.”

“Hmmm, let me look in my thesaurus.”

Justin got out of bed, went to Brian, and put his arms around his waist. “You know, you could just skip Babylon tonight.”

“And turn into a big ole lesbian? I don’t think so.”

Justin laughed, “I don’t think your ‘big picture’ will let you be a lesbian.”

Brian went to the counter and poured himself a scotch.

Brian downed his scotch and flicked his cigarette out the window “You’ve been spending too much time with Debbie; you’re beginning to sound like somebody’s nagging mother. You need a ride somewhere?”

Justin began to put his clothes on. “Nope. I’ll walk.”


Justin grabbed the rest of his clothes, turned and looked at Brian for a second, and whispered, “Go fuck yourself.”

Brian stared after him.

Crack. The room exploded in blood.



Emmett knocked on the door to the hospital room. “Hello, is anybody home?”

Jennifer looked up from the book she was reading. “Can I help you?”

“Yes, I’m here to see Justin.”

“I’m sorry, he’s sleeping now.”

Justin said, “It’s alright, Mom, I’m awake.”

“Are you sure?”


Emmett stood next to Justin’s bed. “Hi, sweetie. You look fabulous. I brought some flowers to brighten up the room a bit.”

Jennifer said, “Let me see if I can find a vase while you two catch up.”

Emmett smiled. “Honey, move over, I need to rest too. I almost sprained my neck looking at all the hot doctors running around.”

Justin giggled as Emmett sat down on the side of the bed. Justin picked up his cup of orange juice.

Emmett looked at Justin’s head and screamed. “Oh my god! Nurse, nurse! We need more bandages. Something in a fuchsia or maybe a chartreuse! This beige will just not do! Stat!”

Justin spit orange juice all over the covers. “Emmett, don’t make me laugh. It hurts.”

“You know, I’ve always wanted to say stat.”

“No, you haven’t.”

“It’s true.” Justin laughed as Emmett started playing with the controls on the bed.

“I’m glad to see you’re laughing. My Aunt Lula always said that laughter was the best way to heal a broken heart.”

“I don’t have a broken heart, I have a broken head.”

“She did too. The family rumor is that she was dropped on her head as a little bitty baby.”

“She was?”

“No, I made that up, but isn’t it a fabulous scandal?”

Justin looked up at Emmett. “Have you seen Brian?”

“Not in a couple of days, sweetie.”

“Did he say when he was going to come and visit me?”

Emmett put his hand on Justin’s cheek. “I’m sure he’ll be here soon, honey. Real soon.”

Jennifer came into the room with the flowers in a vase with some water. “I found this at the nurse’s station. They said I could borrow it.”

Emmett got up and expertly rearranged the flowers. “Hey, do you want me to smuggle some of my Aunt Lula’s homemade chicken noodle soup? You’d be surprised how good it tastes, especially since it smells so horrible.”

Justin laughed, “Maybe next time.”

Emmett stroked Justin’s cheek for a minute. “Listen, gorgeous, I’m going to head on out so you can get some rest. I hate to say that you need your beauty sleep, but you do not look your normally fabulous self.”

“Tell Brian to come see me.”

“I’ll certainly tell him something. Now you go to sleep.”

“Okay. See you later.”

“It was nice to see you, Mrs. Taylor.”

“You too, Emmett.”

Emmett walked out of the hospital room, while Jennifer went back to her book and Justin closed his eyes and went back to sleep.

The walls of the loft glowed faintly red in the moonlight.

Justin was naked. “Damn you, Brian! How long are you going to let me stay in that hospital before you come visit me?”

“You don’t need me there. Besides, I can’t.”

“Why? What’s so goddamned hard about it?”

Brian covered his face with his hands. When he looked up again, Justin was gone, and Debbie was standing in his place.”

“You are one fucking asshole, Brian Kinney. That boy needs you right now. Go visit him.”

“Debbie, leave me the fuck alone.”

“I am not going to leave you the fuck alone. Join the goddamned human race for once, and do something that doesn’t include your dick.”

Brian moaned and covered his head with pillows. When he looked up, the room was empty. Breathing hard, he looked around at the glow of the walls, which were starting to pulse with a deep red. He heard a voice behind him. Turning around, he stared at his own face.

“Get your ass up and head over to Babylon. Those guys in the back room would feel really good on your dick right about now. You won’t have to think about anything else.”

Brian picked up the bottle of scotch next to the bed, and threw it at himself. “Fuck you.”

Justin spoke from behind him.

“Brian, I love you.”

“Fuck you.”

“It wasn’t your fault.”

“Fuck you.”

Brian looked over Justin’s shoulder and saw a giant baseball bat coming towards them.

“Justin! Move!”



“Well, well, well, if it isn’t the long-lost Brian Kinney.”

“Hello, Debbie.”

Debbie cracked her gum. “Emmett tells me that Sunshine asked him when you were going to come by.”

“That’s nice.”

“Nice? Listen, you little shit. Don’t you think you owe it to Justin to at least show up and give him some words of encouragement? Coffee?”

Brian leaned on the counter. “I don’t owe anybody a fucking thing. Coffee to go.”

Debbie poured the coffee. “Now you owe me $1.50. Don’t forget the tax and tip.” She put the coffee back on the counter, came back to the table and sat down.

“I’ll tell you what; I’ll wave the tax and tip because I’m so fucking nice.” Debbie made herself comfortable. “God, my feet are killing me. Spill it, or I’ll spread the rumor that you’ve decided to become an exclusive bottom.”

“Nobody would believe you.”

“You want to bet on it?”

Brian looked at her for a couple of seconds. “There’s nothing to spill.”

“Uh-huh. You know, you don’t look so hot. The last time I saw that many bags under somebody’s eyes, I was looking at myself in the mirror during Vic’s last hospital visit with pneumocystis.”

“Yeah, well, my bags are due to excessive fucking. I’ve got to keep up my reputation against lies and rumors.”

Debbie stared at him for a moment. “Damn, she’s right.”

“What are you talking about?”

“You know what I think? I think you are spending quite a bit of time at that hospital.”

“You think that, huh?”

“Yep, all night, every night, to be exact.”

“You really ought to work at this dump less, Debbie; the fumes from the French fry vat are seeping into your brain.”

“Debbie, where the hell is my food?” It was the leather daddy in the corner booth.

“Hello? I ordered sourdough toast with my eggs, not wheat,” complained his slave boy at the same time.

Debbie shouted over her shoulder, “Keep your wigs on girls, I’m coming.” She turned back to Brian, “Go spend some time with him. He’ll feel better, and so will you. Trust me, I know.” She touched his cheek, and then turned toward the couple behind her. “What the hell are you talking about? Sourdough? You ordered wheat toast and that’s what the fuck you got.”

Brian threw some money on the table, grabbed the coffee, and left the diner.

Brian was gazing out of the window wondering where he had seen those colors before. Justin stepped out of the shower, and began drying his hair. “Brian, do you want Chinese food or pizza?”

Brian turned around.

“When did you get here?”


“When the fuck did you get here?

“I’ve been here for a couple of hours.”

Colors started to pulse and tremble around Justin. Brian’s hands started to shake.

“Justin, get out.”

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“You have to leave. I don’t want you here.”

“Very funny, Brian.”

Brian’s voice hardened. “Justin, you have to leave right now.”

“I’m not going anywhere.”

Brian’s rubbed his chest, which seemed to be hurting for no reason.

“Justin, get the fuck out of here. I don’t want you here.”

“Brian, what the fuck is wrong with you?”

“I told you, I don’t want you here!” Brian threw the nearest pair of jeans at Justin, and pushed him towards the door. The colors flashed brightly and blinded Brian. He closed his eyes. When he opened them again, the bat was swinging.

“Justin, look out!” Brian pushed Justin hard, and Justin fell. Brian stumbled. Crack! A stabbing pain filled his senses as the bat connected. The shock of hitting the floor barely registered.

“Brian!” Justin gathered Brian in his arms. “It wasn’t supposed to be you.”

Brian just laughed.


Emmett breezed into Brian’s office. “Yoo-hoo, anybody home?”

“Well, if it isn’t Princess Bottom come to visit.”

“Aren’t we in a mood today.” Emmett walked over to Brian’s desk and stood looking at him expectantly.

Brian kept his eyes on his work. “I assume you came here for a reason.”

“Of course, I did. Oh, look at all those pretty boys in that picture.”

“Just get to the point, I’ve only had three cups of coffee.”

Emmett smiled. “Good, then you should be really awake.”

“Normally, I don’t open anything more than my left eye with less than four cups.”

“You really should do something about your caffeine addiction.”

“If you’ve come to lecture me about the hazards of drug use, you’re too late.” Brian looked up at Emmett, willing him to leave.

“Actually, I came to talk to you about Justin.”

Brian sighed and looked back at his computer. “I knew I should have put in ear plugs before leaving the house.”

Emmett walked over to the couch and sat down, his legs folded under him. He looked at Brian. “He’s been asking for you.”

“And that would be important how?”

“Brian, Justin needs to know that you’re there for him.”

“Bullshit. Justin doesn’t need anything from me. He needs doctors.”

“You really believe that? Listen sweetie, as my Aunt Lula used to say, even though the pile of horse doodoo in front of you has stopped steaming, it’s still a pile of horse doodoo.”

“What the hell does that mean?”

“It means, Mr. Kinney, that even though you tell yourself the same lie over and over again and convince yourself that it’s true, it’s still a lie.”

“Is this particular lecture over yet? Because I’ve got a client showing up in about 45 seconds.”

“Healing has to do with much more than the physical body, Brian. Justin needs to share his emotional pain with you, too. What’s more, you need to share it with him.”

“I don’t have any emotional pain, but I definitely haven’t had enough coffee. Get out so I can mainline some caffeine.”

“Brian, you may think I’m just a big ole silly bottom, but I know a thing or two about people. What’s more, I know you, and I know what Justin means to you. Get off your ass and go see him.”

“I’m pretty sure I told you to get out.”

“Alright, I’m going. It’s time for me to go to work and dress some fabulous windows, anyway.”

“Try not to hurt the mannequins.” Brian didn’t look up when Emmett left.

Brian got into his Jeep and sat there for a minute. He started the engine, made a u-turn and headed toward Liberty Avenue.

Ten minutes later, he was parked in front of Pittsburgh General Hospital.

He entered the building and went to Justin’s room to look inside. Justin was asleep. Brian looked at him for a long time.

Justin opened his eyes. “It’s about fucking time you showed up.”

Brian stroked Justin’s head as it lay on his chest. Both were enjoying the post-orgasmic flush. Colors gently swirled around them.

Brian whispered, “I keep waiting for something to happen.”

“Like what?”

“I’m waiting for the colors to explode.”

Justin kissed him on the cheek and laid his head back on Brian’s chest. “Go to sleep, Brian.”

As Justin’s breathing deepened, Brian continued to stroke his hair until he felt his own eyes close and gentle darkness surrounded them both.
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